If you don’t value yourself, you’re not going to draw valuable things into your life #romance #relationships #relationship #dating #divorce #girlfriend #boyfriend #toxicrelationships #instalove #instagood #singleguy #singlegirl #singlegirlproblems #foreveralone

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If you don’t value yourself, you’re not going to draw valuable things into your life #romance #relationships #relationship #dating #divorce #girlfriend #boyfriend #toxicrelationships #instalove #instagood #singleguy #singlegirl #singlegirlproblems #foreveralone Continue Reading →

Never beg for a relationship. Be BRAVE to ACCEPT the one who really wants to be with you, and reject the one who just pretends to be with you. #love #lovequotes #lovers #dating #divorce #datingtips #datingadvice #girl #girlfriend #boyfriend #bootycall #truth #player #onthereal #onlinedating #single #soulmate #singlegirl #singleguys #singlelife #singlemoms #singlegirlproblems #romance #relationship #instalove #instagood #dating101

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Never beg for a relationship. Be BRAVE to ACCEPT the one who really wants to be with you, and reject the one who just pretends to be with you. #love #lovequotes #lovers #dating #divorce #datingtips #datingadvice #girl #girlfriend #boyfriend #bootycall #truth #player #onthereal #onlinedating #single #soulmate #singlegirl #singleguys #singlelife #singlemoms #singlegirlproblems #romance #relationship #instalove #instagood #dating101 Continue Reading →

Is Your Past Relationship Baggage Keeping You From Meeting The ONE?

Microsoft PowerPoint - Emotional Baggage PosterWhen we have a relationship end, it leaves mental scars. How you heal those scars determines the quality of your future relationships.
The problem is, rather than healing ourselves, we chose to bury the pain. We may bury the pain with shopping, work, anti-depressants, drugs, and other things. Doing these things merely covers the pain, as opposed to allowing you to work your way through it, which in turn allows you to heal.

In one of my favorite stories, set in medieval times, two monks who are on a long journey are walking through a great forest. One is middle-aged, and has been with their monastic order for years. The other is young and new to the order. As they walk along the path, the hours go by, sometimes in conversation, sometimes in silence.

At one point, they come upon a wide, rapid stream. Sitting at the edge of the water is a young woman, who is evidently in some distress. As soon as she sees the two monks, a look of relief comes over her face, and she hurries up to them. “Father,” she says, addressing the older of the two, “you would be doing me the greatest favor if you would carry me across. The water is swift, and I do not know how to swim. If I should slip and fall . . . .”

“Of course, my child,” the monk replies, “I would be most willing to carry you across.” The young monk shoots his companion a surprised glance–for under the rules of their order, they are strictly forbidden to talk to women, much less touch them. Nevertheless, the older monk takes the young woman up in his arms, carries her across the stream, and sets her down safely on the other side completely dry. After thanking them graciously, she goes on her way, and the two monks continue on their journey.

The young monk begins to berate to older monk.
“How could you? What were you thinking!?!” asked the young monk angrily.
“Yes, I know,” replied the monk hoping that would be the end of it. But the young monk would have non of it and continued to badger him.
“How, then, could you carry that woman across the stream?”
My son,” he replied, “I put the young woman down two hours ago. But you my friend, you are the one still carrying her.”
What baggage are you still carrying? What baggage have you brought into your current relationships that unfairly punish your new love?
Isn’t it time YOU put down your baggage?

Suppose for a moment that you meet The ONE. DO you think that he’s going to see you as a potential wife and partner if you’re still talking about all the messed up men you’ve been with in your life? Do you think he’s going to want to dive into a serious relationship with you if you snap at him for doing things that remind you of your ex? Hell no? So, like the monk in the story said, let go of your baggage…or plan on eventually becoming the crazy neighborhood lady with 30 cats.

Mr. Bigger, Better Deal a.k.a The BBD Player:

The BBD Player is a close cousin to the Perpetual Child. He sees life as a nonstop stop game of one up man ship. “Can I find a hotter girl? Can I find a younger girl? Can I find a freakier girl in the bedroom? His problem is based on the fact that he has unrealistic expectations of finding what he feels would be the ideal woman. Of course, he’s never going to find her because she doesn’t exist, but that doesn’t stop him from blowing through girl, after girl in this endless search. Inevitably, a relationship with him is short lived because he will start making up reasons to criticize you so he can pick fights with you. During this time, he will be actively courting one or more women that he feels may reach is very high (yet unrealistic ideals) BBD Players end up being the creepy old guy at the club, because he doesn’t realize that he’s way past his expiration date, and still thinks he can hook up with the young hotties.

Are you being Played by “The Easy Player?”

The Easy Player:
This player is the easiest to spot. I call him the Easy Player because everything comes to him easy. Women swoon over him and he never had to make an effort to get women. He is extremely handsome and has always been. As a child he was extremely cute. By the time he became a teenager he had girls falling all over him. This kind of player has never had to work to get women, so intellectually he’s not going to be the sharpest tool in the shed. Men like this have coasted on their good looks their entire life. If you have ever been with this type of player, think back as to how you met. Most likely, you made the first move to meet him. At most, he may have thrown a basic line your way to see if you had any interest. That’s the most he will ever do though because he doesn’t need to do anything else.
He’s usually in excellent shape and was a jock in high school. Because he’s coasted throughout life on his good looks, he’s never had a need to expand his mind and learn things. As far as Players go, he’s the most one dimensional. He will also be narcissistic and think only of himself, or at the very least, put his needs way before yours. Don’t expect the sex to be good since he will be solely focused on getting his orgasm and going to sleep afterwards. If you climax, it’s incidental and consider yourself lucky to have had an orgasm.
Don’t mistake the Easy Player with the late bloomer though. The late bloomer is simply a guy that came into his own, as a man, later in life. Guys like this are inherently more cerebral because they didn’t have the good looks in their teen years to coast on. He may have had bad acne as a teen, been too skinny or chubby, and eventually discovered good nutrition and weight training. He eventually had a growth spurt, or transformed his body into its current form. He will be humble to a fault depending on how hard his teen years were. Incidentally, as long as his self-esteem transformed along with his body and face, he will make the best long term partner. To learn more about this and all the other Players click here

Your Desires, Cravings and Needs Are His Tools to Seduce You

Once he knows what your deepest desires are, he can then present himself as if you can get those needs completely fulfilled if you go out with him. Some Players will deliver immediately on their promise to fulfill your desires, while others will string you along for the entire duration of your relationship. He’ll keep letting you think that “it’s just around the corner babe. Hang in there.” Of course you wait and wait and he never delivers.
Let me pause now for a moment to point out an important distinction. There ARE men out there who TRULY want to give you the WORLD. They will go to Hell and back for you because they love you that much. So give these guys some credit, and time to make things happen. So, how do you tell the difference between a man that actually wants to fulfill your desires, versus a Player that is just stringing you along? One word: ACTIONS! The sincere man will be doing something that you can see, to fulfill your desires. A Player, will talk, and talk, and talk, and never lift a finger.
Don’t underestimate the power of this tactic. Politicians get elected time and time again by promising their constituents whatever they want. Of course they never fulfill ANY of the desires of their electorate, yet people still fall for the games, deceit and lies. Why? Because we can easily become blinded by our emotions when we deeply want something.
The best antidote to keep a Player from using your desires to manipulate you is to be so complete as a woman, that you don’t NEED him to help you get anything. If you desire financial security, learn what it takes to create multiple streams of income. If you desire Love, surround yourself with loving healthy people that help fulfill part of that desire. Of course, the love of friends, family, and even a pet isn’t the same as the love of a man that you’re in a committed relationship with, however, having SOME love in your life will make you less likely to get used and abused.
This has been an excerpt from the book. If you’d like to learn more about Players and how never to have your heart broken by one again please get the book now at Amazon.com

Has This Type of Player Left You Heartbroken? The “I Hate Women Player”

The “I Hate Women” Player:

“Primates which have never loved early, never love late.” – H.F. Harlow

This one is the most dangerous to watch out for because he has the ability to do the most damage to you!  If you’re used to men always hitting on you, this one has a lot of appeal because he’s the one that is “emotionally unavailable.”  He instantly becomes a challenge to you.  He’s not like all the other guys or so you think!  He doesn’t give me the time of day!  And the game is afoot!  You feel that his aloof nature is simply him playing hard to get. What you don’t  realize is that he’s not playing hard to get, he’s simply emotionally detached, and doesn’t  like women. Sure he’ll take you for a “spin around the block” but the damage to your heart and soul may take years to repair.

A friend of mine, I’ll call him James is the stereotypical I Hate Women Player.  He’s a great guy. Smart, funny, handsome, but he’s got one serious demon lurking in his past.  When he was six years old, his drug addicted mother put him up for adoption.  He spent the next 12 years of his life bouncing from one abusive foster home to another. As soon has he turned 18 he went out on his own, but the scars of being abandoned by his mother still haunt him.  He’s now forty and still single.   READ MORE about the various Players, the way they manipulate you and how to protect yourself